Day 4 – MC
Down, but not out.
Today was a little trying. It should’ve been predictable but
it was anything but. Ro decided he wanted me to carry him all afternoon. So I did.
Even if I put him down for a second, he made it a point to vocalize his
displeasure until I carried him back up again. All in all, he was in my arms
from noon till 5. The first couple of hours was fun because we played and we
danced and had some tummy time and exercises. But then he got tired and
irritated and just did not want to be left alone anywhere. Not in the playpen
or swing or seat or mat. My mother came (God
bless mums) to relieve me so I could go make dinner. As soon as dinner was
ready and Ellil was fed, I had to take him back from my mom again so she could go
home and by the time I finally put Ro to sleep it was almost 8:30 p.m.
You know, every night as a habit I try to recap my day and
think about how productive I was and what I learned from it. I’ve been doing
this for over a decade now and for the most part it really helps me feel better
about the day that I just lived or at least give me focus for the next day. But
today was one of those days where I haven’t a clue what I was supposed to
learn. Does making dinner and feeding
and bathing my kids count as being productive enough? 3 more minutes till March
13, 2013 is gone, never to be seen again. Outside of the spit-up and drool on
my shirt sleeves, residual baby lotion on my hands and baby toothpaste stain
splattered across the chest of my shirt, how am I different now than I was 24
hours ago?
The glass half full people will say “Don’t be silly Priya. You
had a full day to love your kids and bond with them.” To which I’d reply, “Yah
yah, but I do that every day and then I do some more. I didn’t get the
opportunity for the latter part today…you know the part where I do something
for me.” Ding ding DING!! Did you hear that alarm bell go off because I just
did and boy that was a rude awakening! I suppose
some days it really isn’t about me. Sometimes, it’s purely about taking care of
the kids’ needs and that is all. Is it really that simple? Wow. Food for thought.
Motherhood is humbling.
I highly recommend it.
It's hard to think that sometimes you just need to think of your day as purely about your kids... I have found in my many years of motherhood that sometimes all you need in a day, is 5 minutes of peace to yourself. Something as simple as going to the washroom in peace without that little tap at the door calling Mommy!!!! or a hand peaking under the door :).
ReplyDeleteI found for me when I looked back at my day and though I did nothing today except run around after the kids, or just looked after them, I looked at it in terms of the fact that I was a good parent, didn't scream at them, didn't loose my cool when I could have on numerous occasions. Played and had fun with them. Then I would realize that the rest, really isn't as important and can wait. The time that you spend with your kids in invaluable and once missed, you will never get it back. Trust me..... mine are 9 and 7 and things are totally different then when they were little.
But I also think that every parent deserves a few minutes of peace and quiet to just recharge if you want to call it that. Take a deep breath and then continue on. It's hard to do that when you are the only parent and there isn't anyone else to watch the kids.
I hear ya on the washroom comment. been there and done that! you're right about what you write in the second paragraph. but I find you do have to take a step back, take a breath and then make that realisation.
ReplyDeleteyup, It was definitely easier prior to this 'challenge'. I don't know how single parents do it. Especially with multiple kids. I'm already counting down to March 29th!